Fall is falling...sigh. It is getting cooler in the mornings and the sun is hiding a bit more. I just want to curl up in a blanket with a good book. Hmmmm....perhaps Nina (my crazy dog) has the right idea!
Blessings!
Chérene
Remember to cherish this journey we call life...your footprints are a gift from above!
Monday, September 17, 2012
Wednesday, July 18, 2012
A View...of Claire
The room was surprisingly big, as nursing homes
go. Glancing up at the ceiling, though,
I could see that the room used to house two patients. Or, should I say, residents. The tracks that control privacy curtains were
still visible. The room was pretty bare. It just did not have much
personality. There was a dark wooden
armoire angled in one corner, a single hospital bed, a night stand, a hospital
tray table and a television mounted to the wall. Oh, and I forgot to mention the one chair
that was filled with extra sheets and blankets and, the window with a view to
nowhere. And there sat my sister, Claire,
in a wheelchair. She was surprised to
see us. Her expressions are exaggerated
because MS has really slowed her brain and responses.
But, we still got a warm reception and weak hugs. Her sense of humor is quite intact though. She wanted to know why her son had brought “aliens”
with him. I am sure that comment was
aimed at me since I am the Trekker. Hmmm…I
guess it has been a long time since we were in the same room together. We talk on the phone often enough, but our
lives seem so far apart even though the distance is only roughly two hours by
car. She laughed when I rolled my eyes
at her and told her to “Live Long and Prosper”.
She loved the flowers that we brought.
They were after all, the brightest thing in the room. I know that my sister needs a certain level
of care and that she may not be able to live without assistance any more. But, she should be able to live! There was not a lot of life in that
room. I get that residents need some “hospital–like”
equipment and all, but could they at least make the place a little cozy. Does it all have to look so antiseptic and dingy? The room dwarfed Claire. She must only weigh eighty or eighty-five
pounds. She has always been tiny, but
not like that.
Her hair, that had once
almost reached her waist, was cut short and was very curly. She told us it was her “Halle Berry” look. And, I could not help but notice the contracting
muscles in her left leg. She explained
that she was going to have surgery to help relax the muscle and ease the
pain.
She did not know when or what was
going to happen after that. “Are you
coming back here?”I asked. “Oh, I don’t
know”, she mused. We brought her up to speed about all her nieces and nephews and their
children. She looked amazed as I showed
her pictures on my cell phone and said” Everybody is so big!” She laughed when her son said that “We kids grow,
Mom” and she said she was trying to sell him but no one was buying! She picked up the phone to dial and it took a
lot of concentration for her to coordinate making her fingers work and getting
the number right. Her son laughed and
told her she had a crazy “phone face”.
After a while, we left and promised to come see her again soon. I laughed about the crocheted pink flamingo pillow on her bed. Claire used to crochet a lot and was quite talented. She said she had made it. I was glad someone thought to bring it because it was at least a familiar thing…something that reminded her of home.
Well, that place is not going to be her home…at least not looking like that! We are on the hunt for a better nursing “home” and when we find it, we are going to jazz it up. MS or not, Claire deserves to “live” as much as she is able and not be stashed away like a forgotten dusty book. And, there will be a view.
Remember to treasure your footsteps. They are a gift from above.
Blessings!
Chérene
Sunday, July 8, 2012
Watermelon thoughts of Claire
I’m not
the best blogger. I’m not the best at a
lot of things, I guess. Life kind of
gets in the way. And then, something just happens to you...just out of the
blue. Like today. I was cooking. It was nothing fancy...steak,
potatoes with butter and parsley and salad.
I pulled pot holders down from the shelf to check the oven. They are crocheted
and shaped like watermelon slices with seeds and all. My sister made them for me...my baby
sister. I stared at those pot holders
and lots of those “back-in-the-day” images flooded me. You know the ones. We all have them at some time or
another. My Mom is and was a beauty and my sister Claire is the
spitting image of her. My baby sister is Claire...the little one, the pretty
one, the popular one, the smart one, the driven one...and now, the sick
one. You see, my sister has Multiple
Sclerosis...the primary-progressive kind.
That means there is no remission, no relief, no improvement. My sister knew what she wanted to be almost
from birth. That would be a nurse. She got one of those nurse outfits for her
4th birthday and it hung in a place of honor in her closet for years. I mean years...well into her 20s. She even had the bag with the pretend syringe
and candy pills. When my brother got the
measles and the family was supposed to go berry picking, she volunteered to
stay home and take care of him. She was
only five and she sacrificed strawberry picking or rather eating in her case. When I broke my arm, my mom made me suffer
the indignity of having my little sis spoon feed me vegetable soup so she could
be nurturing. And that same mom of mine
volunteered me as a guinea pig when my sister needed to practice administering
shots when she was doing her clinical training...ouch. I endured the hot sun at her college
graduation. When my Mom collapsed at
home, in the middle of the night, you can’t even imagine how grateful I was
that my sister, the nurse, was at home and knew what to do. And we held hands at the funeral. And, yes, she became a nurse and what a nurse
she was! She went on to earn her Master’s
degree and almost achieved her PHD before the MS robbed her of her plans. She worked at a hospital and even taught
nursing to others. Even now, when she is not so clear in her thoughts, she
still can give everyone smart advice about medical things. Images of her cuteness and her smiling face
keep floating in my brain. I can see her in the
Halloween costumes that my Mom always hand made and in her high school
cheerleading uniform. She played the
saxophone and was Salutatorian of her high school class. I can see her in her cap, gown and hood with
her gorgeous smile. But, I also see how
she has deteriorated...how small and fragile she is. Even though she repeats herself during
conversation and she isn’t always coherent, she always remembers everyone’s
birthday and calls to say “have a happy day”.
Her favorite color is pink and each time we talk, she tells me she needs
an address book, some slippers (pink of course) and a wind up alarm clock. Well, once again, I find myself talking to
God . I mean, I have two sisters and go
figure, they both have MS. How does that
happen in one life? And, why? My other sister, Colette, has the relapsing/remitting
kind of MS so she is not in the same shape as Claire. Claire is in the hospital now. She is probably headed for a nursing home
because the medical folks keep throwing the words “constant care” around. Claire is not that old. As a matter of fact, the problem that
presents is that many nursing homes will not take her because she is “too
young”. But, I don’t want to think
about that. I prefer the yesterday images floating in my brain. Something I saw prompted me to seek out
Isaiah 40:29-31..”.He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of
the weak. Even youths grow tired and
weary; and your men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew
their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and
not grow weary, they will walk and not faint. “
I am praying and hoping that Claire dreams about the same images that
float in my brain. I love you Claire and
I know that you are soaring with the eagles...and I am praying for miracles.
Blessings,
ChereneThursday, March 1, 2012
Boys and Toys!
Cleaning the garage is like going on a treasure hunt. I find all kinds of things. I found some of my boy's old toys. C'mon, who doesn't like toys? So, I asked them if they wanted to keep them and of course I was a bit surprised when they both responded with a quick "No, Mom. Throw them away". What!? But they're memories! How can you throw memories away. Okay, so I am a pack-rat, but memories are serious. I remember when these toys came to live at my house. I remember watching my boys play with them and the hours of delight they brought. The toys were always present when we watched their respective TV shows and they were great for keeping bouncy boys quiet at restaurants while we were waiting for our food. So, again, I ask,"How do you throw away memories"? Well, if you are me, you take pictures of them. Yeah, my boys shook their heads when I grabbed my camera and asked them to pick out some of their favorites. They teased me but they will appreciate the warm fuzzy feelings they get when they look at the pictures in the years to come. I can just hear them telling stories of how they played with the toys. And, I did get rid of them...well, sort of. I just did what any self-respecting pack-rat would do...I passed them on to my grand-twins. And you can bet I am going to take their pictures with those toys!
Can you name these toys? |
Sting-Dragon Flyz-Power Ranger (Jason)-Pikachu-Mighty Ducks |
Sting was a favorite! |
Dragon Flyz were fun to launch! |
Etch-A-Sketch and Legos |
Sunglasses and Pooh! |
So, what toys are you hiding in your garage or attic? :-D
Blessings!
Cherene
Remember to cherish this journey we call life...your footprints are a gift from above!
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Light
"I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness because it shows me the stars.” ~ Og Mandino
When I came upon the above quote, it really spoke to me because I love light. I love the warmth and light of the sun and I love gazing at the stars. When I was a little girl and my family was driving somewhere at night, I would pretend that all the cars headlights and taillights were strings of rubies and diamonds. I have stood in my share of fields at dusk to see the light of fireflies flickering in the air. All three of my children were born when it was warm. I sang lullabies to each one of them under glow of the stars in the night sky. Even now, I love to stand outside under the night sky and pray. I just feel closer to God when I am gazing at the beauty of the night sky. I don't know why...I just love light. I guess my love of light helps explain why I love photography so much. The word "photography" comes from two Greek words. Photo comes from "phos" and means light and graphy comes from "graphi" which means to write or draw. The exact form in greek is fotografia. So, as a photographer, we write or draw with light. Fascinating...
When I came upon the above quote, it really spoke to me because I love light. I love the warmth and light of the sun and I love gazing at the stars. When I was a little girl and my family was driving somewhere at night, I would pretend that all the cars headlights and taillights were strings of rubies and diamonds. I have stood in my share of fields at dusk to see the light of fireflies flickering in the air. All three of my children were born when it was warm. I sang lullabies to each one of them under glow of the stars in the night sky. Even now, I love to stand outside under the night sky and pray. I just feel closer to God when I am gazing at the beauty of the night sky. I don't know why...I just love light. I guess my love of light helps explain why I love photography so much. The word "photography" comes from two Greek words. Photo comes from "phos" and means light and graphy comes from "graphi" which means to write or draw. The exact form in greek is fotografia. So, as a photographer, we write or draw with light. Fascinating...
Fireworks in the park near my house. The Grand Finale And, this is the sunset in the park! Blessings! Cherene Remember to cherish this journey we call life...your footprints are a gift from above. |
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